everytime i think about being 18 i have to stop myself from crying?

i dont know why though?

i think? maybe i feel as though my teen years were wasted?

and i uh, dont really know whats going on with my life?, and dont get me wrong ive never known whats going on but now that im a adult i feel as though i should of known *anything* by now?

like, is this really what my life is going to be like?

but with all of that being said i didnt expect those problems to feel so much worse because of a birthday? i kinda thought it would feel just like any other day haha,,